If anyone knows what it’s like to be a loyal fan of the Purple, it’s the readers of SKÖLIOSIS — your weekly reminder that being a Vikings fan is bad for your health.

SHOULD WE DO THE MOST MINNESOTA THING EVER, EVEN THOUGH IT’S THE MOST MINNESOTA THING EVER?

That was a tough watch last Sunday. It’s never a good thing when you feel sorry for your NFL team’s starting quarterback. I personally hope J.J. McCarthy’s girlfriend and mother of his children does not have social media. I hope J.J. himself doesn’t read the comments. Because my entire algorithm is currently overflowing with McCarthy ridicule. If someone has made it, it’s come across my feed. People on stilts training to be McCarthy’s receivers. Check. Vikings fans from the start of the season calling themselves in the future. Check. Anything “Nine” related. Check. If J.J. was flying the planes they would have missed the twin towers. Check. If J.J. would have spiked the ball on every drive his QBR would have been higher than he had against the Packers. Check.

It’s been brutal. I’m not even sure how all this content is being made as quickly as it’s being made. I’m sure A.I. is prominently involved, but if the Russians worked to overturn the last Presidential election, I feel like there are at least the same amount or more content creators presently trying to help create a regime change at quarterback for the Purple.

So where do we go from here? The Vikings are 4-7 and in last place in the NFC North. It seems like it’s over. J.J. himself raised his hand to be put in concussion protocol even though he and the team couldn’t identify a moment where he hit his head in the game. Maybe J.J. will be available to play Sunday against Sam Darnold and the Seattle Seahawks, maybe he won’t, and the decision will be made for us.

If we assume McCarthy can play, we’re left with two divergent paths. One is to keep playing McCarthy, the first-round pick and $20 Million investment, and see what we really have so we’re not still wondering next off-season. Does he get better? Can we work with this kid?

The other is to just hold down Control Alt Delete and move on to backup Max Brosmer. In this scenario, we’ve quickly decided McCarthy isn’t any good, and we can’t stand watching him grind the gears of our purple Lamborghini of an offense when we all know he can’t drive a stick.

What can’t be ignored is how Minnesotan this decision truly is. On one hand, if we bail on McCarthy early and never find out, he for sure will rise from the ashes some day and become great somewhere else. They’ll be selling “Nine” action figures in New Orleans or Tennessee by the truckload, and McCarthy will be doing seminars and writing books about his winning mentality.

Not to mention, if we’re being honest, the only reason we’re even talking about Max Brosmer is because he played for the hometown Gophers. We’re Minnesotans, we can’t help ourselves, we love the local interest story and the Minnesota connection. And while he didn’t grow up here, Max fits the bill “one of us” because he rowed the boat for the maroon and gold. And while none of us have any idea if he’ll be any good as a NFL quarterback, we all have a sneaking suspicion he might just be the next Brock Purdy. Why? Well, mostly because he played for the hometown Gophers. Hmmm.

Let’s break down our two options further.

9 LIVES OR NINE LIVES?

“9 Lives” can be interpreted a couple different ways. If we stick with J.J. the rest of the way, you’d be giving him “9 Lives” like a cat. You’d decide to give him “enough rope” as they say. Get the sample size up so we can see what we really have here. To mix metaphors, J.J.’s “9 Lives” might look like beating a dead horse by the end of the season. It might look like the very definition of insanity: doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. But if he keeps air mailing receivers and holding onto the ball too long, at least we’ll know it’s time to empty the litter box and try something new this off season.

Or maybe the outcome is pronounced a little differently and “Nine Lives.” Over these last few weeks, McCarthy’s hopes to become a starting NFL quarterback are revived and don’t perish with the 2025 season. Maybe he shows us flashes, he gets better, and we start to believe he could be our guy. Maybe he at least gets back to maybe.

The case for sticking with J.J. is that we need to know. We can’t lose an entire season and head into the off season still unsure what we have at quarterback.

MAD MAX BEYOND BLUNDERDOME

The other option is to say, “we’ve seen enough,” soft bench McCarthy (again) and flip the switch to Max Brosmer. In this scenario, you’re hoping for a Josh Dobbs “Passtronaut” breakout from Brosmer. He becomes Brock Purdy North, he puts his hands at ten and two on the steering wheel of the powerful Vikings offense and we go on a little run to end the season. And even if we do miss the playoffs (which is likely), at least it’s more fun to throw a Hail Mary at the quarterback position and see if Mad Max can take us beyond the Purple’s recent Blunderdome.

FROZEN TUNDRA AS ROCK BOTTOM

Regardless of the decision Sunday against Seattle, last week sure felt like rock bottom. Seeing Myles “Price Drop” let a kick go over his head, only to decide to block for no one and have the football bonk of his head for a turnover was an absolute gut punch—and maybe the most Vikings moment of the season. Having special teams blunders cost you football games is like death by paper cut. It’s the worst way to lose, and the 2025 Vikings have mastered it.

The Vikings are fragile right now, and so is the fanbase. We now roll our eyes when anyone says “quarterback whisperer” wondering if Coach O’Connell is a misguided ego maniac when we thought he might be Bud Grant’s secret son less than a year ago. We’re waiting for Justin Jefferson to explode on the sidelines. And maybe worst of all, we’re stuck watching horrible football with an anemic offense and worst of all had to see the Packers mock the Skol chant. It doesn’t get much more violating than that.

OUR VOTE: STICK WITH THE KID.

Bet you didn’t see that one coming. Yep, we think we should stick with the kid. As humorous as it might be to hold END MCCARTHISM signs up at U.S. Bank Stadium down the stretch, we can’t get past the Minnesota of it all.

This is exactly the mistake we’d normally make. We’ll shelf the first-round pick who has been a winner his whole life because he didn’t play well the first few games of his career. We’ll give up on him too soon, and someday, somewhere—you watch! J.J. McCarthy will be the next Sam Darnold, Danny Dimes, Baker Mayfield . . .take your pick! And we’ll be the typical Minnesotans who traded Big Papi to the Red Sox because he couldn’t bunt for the Twins.

And why did we do it? Because his backup played for the Gophers, and we were spoiled and couldn’t stand watching some ugly regular season football for a few weeks. Okay, maybe there’s a one in thousand chance that Max Brosmer is Brock Purdy. But isn’t it far more likely that Brosmer is Nick Mullens, Josh Dobbs – or any of the rest of them. He doesn’t save the season. He isn’t the answer, and we finish 2025 still not knowing what we have with our first-round pick McCarthy.

We can’t have that. Let’s take off the kid gloves off the kid. Let’s remove the throw pillows from the soft benching. Let’s keep running McCarthy out there for the next 6 games and if he keeps getting knocked down, let’s see if he has what it takes to dust himself off and get back up. We always complain here in Minnesota that we’re “Mid”—never good enough to be great, and never bad enough to rebuild. They say it’s always darkest before the dawn, so why don’t we not fall for the same passive aggressive Minnesota sports bullshit, and just padlock the exits and see if McCarthy figures it out.

Seeing how much the Internet is throwing at this kid, I find myself rooting for him. Let’s listen to our better angels and give him the year to show us what he might become. As for the watchable factor, well, we get to see him square off against Sam Darnold which is fun. And you’ll get to see him run it back against teams like the Packers and Lions which will allow us to see if he’s improved. We drafted him for a reason. Let’s find out if we were right or wrong, because the worst option is not knowing.

And no matter what happens, at least it will be good content.

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SKOL!!

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